It’s unusual for a wife to speak at her husband’s military retirement ceremony. More “normal” is for him to give her a gift—maybe a bouquet of roses—and then speak about her sacrifices as a military wife. Then she usually receives a commendation—pictures are made with her—and much applause is given to her, as it should. So when I heard about this poem, recently included in the printed retirement program of a dear friend, I believed it should be shared.

I am always on the lookout for good marital “helps”—especially concerning military marriages. The challenges of military life are so many and the stresses so high we need to be on high alert concerning the state of our own marriage and those of our friends. I especially appreciate articles which give advice to help friends help friends. You know—you want to help others with troubled marriages but just don’t know how . . . and are especially fearful of “making things worse.” It’s rare to find such help.

When I face some new challenge in my life—even potentially scary—one thing I seek to do is to gain perspective. The ground under me might be shaking, but I’m trying to hang onto something solid . . . something that will help me to make sense of it, help me to remember that I’m not alone, help me to realize that it’s not forever. You know—perspective. Today I join the ranks of millions of mothers who have gone before me, saying good-by to their sons and sending them off to war. My son is deploying . . . again.