Sometimes . . . when someone has experienced a tragedy, it’s best to sit with them in silence. Not always, but sometimes. Alistair Begg, senior pastor of Parkside Church in Cleveland, Ohio, calls that “Eloquent Silence.”
I remember one of our local chaplains telling us about a visit he made to a Navy family in the housing area whose baby had died. When he arrived, he sat with the couple on the front porch. Just sat with them. Later the couple told him that was the most helpful thing he could have done at the time. He acted according to Romans 12:15, “. . . mourn with those who mourn.”
Wait Training
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For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come. — 1 Timothy 4:8
Most of us are familiar with waiting. We probably complain about it. “Not wasting time” is probably high on our New Year’s resolution lists. I’m a commercial airline pilot now, but when I was in the Air Force I spent a good amount of time on ground or airborne alert in the A-7 and A-10 Close Air Support business—waiting to scamble on the ground commander’s call. So I’m familiar with waiting, and with watching people wait.
I remember one particular time of waiting, over twenty years ago. It was the winter of 1986 . . . we were not at war, but the young fighter pilots sitting alert in their A-10s at Suwon Air Base, Republic of Korea, felt differently. It was our job to enforce a cease fire agreement from an armistice that was initiated some thirty-three years prior. We were ordered to wait—to wait for the launch signal that would send us to an area where we had trained, doing what we were prepared to do—but this time under different conditions. It was a dangerous time. But we had to wait for the signal. As we waited, our minds raced, wandered, feared, or angered . . .
It happens to all of us when we wait. Sometimes what starts in our minds can go to feelings—an impression—coming quickly and stealing our awareness of reality, distracting us from what we need to focus on while we wait. You see, there is a huge difference between “waiting” and “wasting time.” There is a purpose in waiting, or should be . . . a strategic pause in which the Spirit of God can speak if we will have ears to hear what He would have to say to us. Times of waiting might be fertile opportunities to listen and perhaps to act . . . and as we learn over time how this works in our lives we can call the conditioning effort “Wait Training.”
Perhaps you are in a waiting mode right now—waiting to deploy, waiting to return home, waiting for your family to be together again, waiting for a new assignment, waiting for a promotion, waiting for medical reports, waiting for a job offer, waiting for the birth of a baby, waiting for paperwork on a business transaction, maybe even waiting for the long day to end. I’d propose that there are three activities which can train us in the way we should wait, and make our waiting more productive than destructive:
1). Begin with prayer. Center your thoughts on who God is and how you can grow in love by growing in your knowledge of Him, who is Love. Perhaps you have a favorite spot to go to and pray—communicating with God who loves you and has a plan for your life. This contemplative time can bring you to call out to Him in your praise of Him, in your thanksgiving of the many ways in which He has blessed you, in your confession of sin, in your distress and pain, in your hope, in your time of intercession for others. Reading His word and being still in His presence will bring you to that deep communion with Him—and lead you to pray. Even if you don’t have a particular place or time to pray, remember that He is always there—always ready to hear you no matter when or whatever circumstance you might be in. Train yourself to pray always: “And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.” (Ephesians 6:18) “Be joyful always, pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18) “Is any one of you in trouble? He should pray.” (James 5:13a) “Devote yourselves to prayer, being watchful and thankful.” (Colossians 4:2)
2). Work at what He calls you to do. Our faith can grow as we wait if we will do what the old saints would call “doing the next thing.” There is a great cycle here—in faith we produce works which are pleasing to Him, which He has prepared in advance for us to do—and in turn that inspires our faith to more expressions of love and worship. It takes stepping out . . . . actively seeking His will in the period of waiting. Perhaps you need to ask just that, “Lord, what is it that You would have me do during this time? I don’t want to be frustrated—I want to grow in my knowledge and love of You!” There is no division between our spiritual life and our work life—it’s all His! In the military, and on the home front, there are tasks which we are called to do every day. Do them as unto the Lord. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” (Colossians 3:23) Perhaps He is calling you to more training, perhaps to more responsibilities at your work place or church, perhaps you need to be more diligent in your self-discipline to strengthen some weaknesses. Perhaps He wants you to begin a Bible study with others, or perhaps He even wants you to write down your experiences with what He is teaching you in patience and endurance during this time. Laziness can steal time which the Lord would have us to use—even in waiting!
3). Wait (on others). Here is a different definition of “wait,” so stay with me! This definition of “wait” is “to attend as a servant.” Whom can you serve—or “wait on”—during this time? Watch for opportunities to help someone. Perhaps God has given you this unique time, this Kairos, as a special gift in order to serve someone during their time of need. Perhaps you are the at-home spouse and see the chance to help a neighbor who could use a hand or a listening ear . . . . or you are deployed and can help someone who is overwhelmed in their situation. Serving others, “waiting” on them, is a way in which our Father gets us through our wait training. I see it happen all the time in airports—people who help a young mother with strollers and bags, people who let someone go ahead of them because of their flight connection, people who will change seats in the gate area so that a family can sit together. These acts of kindness do not go unnoticed by our heavenly Father who wants us to use our Chronos time (minutes, hours, days) to serve Him. “ . . . whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.” (Matthew 25:40)
Perhaps you are one of those who keeps a “countdown calendar” for when your deployment will be over. That can be a hopeful tool, but with a little Wait Training, each day can be more than just an uncomfortable experience, or a square filled in a meaningless picture puzzle, before redeployment and reintegration. Make the Training Circuit . . . . pray, work, and “wait” on others . . . and repeat as many times as necessary! Don’t forget: “ . . . those who wait on the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.” (Isaiah 40:31) That’s the ultimate result of good Wait Training!
And what about that time back in ’86, when our squadron waited? The signal never came—but we were trained, and we were ready if needed. So there’s the question to spur us on—are you trained to wait (pray, work, “wait”), ready for this unique (and perhaps difficult) time to be all that the Lord wants it to be?
I wait for the LORD, my soul waits, and in His word I put my hope. — Psalm 130:5
But you must return to your God; maintain love and justice, and wait for your God always. — Hosea 12:6
But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me. — Micah 7:7
Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him! — Isaiah 30:18
I waited patiently for the LORD; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the LORD. — Psalm 40:1-3
Questions to Share:
1. Is there a time that you can remember in which you had to wait—and God revealed something that you would not have learned otherwise? What did you learn?
2. What are you waiting for right now? What is God teaching you during this time?
3. Make sure you pray for guidance, work at your God-given tasks, and watch for how you can serve others.
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