I don’t know about you, but as a soldier the thought that I might lose any ground to an adversary makes me dig deeper, ball up my fists and redouble my efforts to fight and win ...
As bad as physical defeat is, Paul tells us in his letter to the Christians at Ephesus that the physical battles we face are a diversion. The reality is that the physical battles we fight are caused by the spiritual battle that is going on in the background. These days we are getting more and more accustomed to fighting a physical enemy that uses tricks, lies, ambushes, coercion and terror to try to destroy us. Our physical enemy is merely following the lead of our spiritual enemy---the difference being that our spiritual enemy can also penetrate our homes and directly target our families.
A Renewal of Covenant Marriage Vows
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“Haven’t you read,” He (Jesus) replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” — Matthew 19:4-6
Covenant. Commitment. These are words we share in the Christian church, and in the Christian marriage.
And sometimes, as a time of remembrance and renewal, couples will recite their wedding vows again to each other . . . as a sign that “what was true then is still true now.” Perhaps even more so.
Sometimes couples will mark a special anniversary with the renewing of their vows. Sometimes before deployment. Sometimes after deployment.
A church in Michigan recently had a ceremony attended by couples who wanted to renew their wedding vows. The words which the pastor (Pastor Mark Haines of Bay City Wesleyan Church, Bay City, Michigan) wrote and the attendees recited are as beautiful and true as any I have ever read. Shared by Bob and Cheryl Moeller on “Marriage Minutes,” the write-up was entitled, “Three Things Your Spouse Needs to Hear and You Need to Say”:
I Did
At our wedding ceremony, I chose you to be my spouse.
I promised to live with you according to God’s holy Word.
On that life changing day, I promised to love you,
to comfort you,
to honor and keep you.
I swore to stand by you
for better or worse,
in sickness and in health.
At our wedding I renounced all others
and promised to give myself to only you, so long as we both shall live.
The pastor said, “Will you take this one?”
And I did.
I Do
Today, I choose you to be my spouse.
I promise to continue living with you according to God’s holy Word.
On this ordinary day of our life together, I promise to keep on loving you,
to keep on comforting you,
to keep on honoring and keeping you.
Today, I am standing by you
for better or worse,
in sickness and in health.
Today and every day, I renounce all others
(no websites, no magazines, no videos, no lingering leers, or secret meetings).
I give myself to you and only you, so long as we both shall live.
People may ask, “Will you take this one?”
And, you must know, I do.
I Always Will
Tomorrow and everyday God gives us, I will choose you to be my spouse.
I will continue living with you according to God’s holy Word.
Every day we share by God’s grace, I promise to always love you,
to always comfort you,
to always honor and keep you.
As long as I have breath, I will stand by you
for better or worse,
in sickness and in health.
I will always renounce all others
and always give myself to only you, so long as we both shall live.
Our great-grandchildren may ask, “Will you take this one?”
And, you can count on this, I always will.
I did.
I do.
I always will.
Your spouse needs to hear these 3 things and you need to say them as you gaze into his or her eyes.
Wow—I find this to be powerful.
Another beautiful renewal ceremony for military comes at the end of the HomeBuilders Bible study Making Your Marriage Deployment Ready. Called the “Marriage Commitment Ceremony,” the vows recited are:
“Believing that God, in His wisdom and providence, has established marriage as a covenant relationship, a sacred and lifelong promise, reflecting our unconditional love for each other and believing that God intends for the marriage covenant to reflect His promise to never leave us nor forsake us, We commit our lives to be faithful to each other during the unique challenges of military service and beyond . . . to seek God’s help in order to finish strong, standing firm on the vows that we made on our wedding day, and on the Word of God which gives us the blueprint for this commitment.”
Perhaps this is a day for you to say these words to your spouse. Perhaps there is a day in the future, Lord willing, when you can say these words to your spouse—or you can say them to each other.
I pray so.
Work Cited:
Bob and Cheryl Moeller, “Marriage Minutes,” Wednesday, February 22, 2012.
Montgomery, Mike and Linda and Keith and Sharon Morgan, Making Your Marriage Deployment Ready (Little Rock: FamilyLife Publishing, 2008), p. 95.
Questions to Share:
1. Pray that the Lord will give you wisdom as to how you may use these vow renewal ceremonies in your own marriage.
2. Consider writing your own renewal of vows which might speak directly to what you and your spouse share in your commitment to each other.
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