Another day—another email announcing marital troubles as a result of poor decisions made during deployment. I want to scream, “Oh, No!! Not again!!” Didn’t this couple know there were dangers—weren’t they warned?
It is a beautiful thing to see a couple get through something that challenges them in every area of their lives (like a deployment)—and because of faith they do not give up. When the deployment is over, they can look back over the months of discouragement/loneliness/fear and say with confidence, “My God took me through this.” And what if things did not go easily—struggles with children/finances/ temptations/health?
When I see an article on marriage, I automatically think “what does this say to a military marriage?” Ministry to military has wired me this way—thankfully. So when I read the article on FamilyLife.com entitled “5 Biggest Little Ways to Improve Your Marriage” I naturally went to “what does this say to a military marriage?”
In the last pages of "What Did You Expect??" Paul David Tripp summarizes his writing with this: “What has this book been about? It has been a detailed description of the daily work of love that must be done with commitment and joy when a flawed person is married to a flawed person and they are living in a fallen world." Did you catch that—“Daily work ..." So how do you do that under the challenge of deployment?
I love the story of the two men on the road to Emmaus in Luke 24, as Jesus walks beside them and talks to them in the days after His resurrection but before His ascension. His presence was so real, but at first they did not know who He was. Jesus asks them, “What are you discussing together as you walk along?”
My Christmas celebration includes listening to the delivered words of Dr. S. M. Lockridge in his sermon, “That’s My King!" And a similar joy comes at Easter when I listen to his preaching “It’s Friday. . . but Sunday’s Comin'!” I trust you will be encouraged by his powerful presentation put together with scenes from Mel Gibson’s “The Passion of The Christ.” The video clip captures joy which Christians are experiencing because of the truth of the empty tomb on Resurrection Sunday.
When a military service member, single or married, arrives at your church, you must know that they are there for a reason. . . . .and they are there for a season. God sent them to you for His purpose—to love them and build into them a greater love for God as revealed in His holy word. But they are only there for a period of time—and sometimes they will go directly from your fellowship to a combat tour overseas. What a great opportunity to teach, mentor, prepare, train, and encourage! If we, as an individual or a church (or chapel) don’t see that, we need to look more closely.
So here’s the question: What would it look like if a Christian couple chose to face military life as an opportunity to exhibit and demonstrate Christ-likeness under all circumstances. . . even deployment? What would it look like if they faced the challenges of “constant schedule changes, the times of transition, the long periods of waiting, (for orders, housing, homecomings, etc.) the many uncertainties concerning deployments, the long periods of single-parenting, the long ‘silent’ periods during separations, the months spent ‘camping out’ at each new location, the adjustments of each family member at new homes, schools, and working environments” (Footsteps of the Faithful, p. 11) totally relying on God to meet their needs, strengthen and comfort them, in order to be able to finish strong? It would look like the McColl family, as shared in the book Footsteps of the Faithful, subtitled “Victorious Living and The Military Life.”
I suppose it’s not very “military” to describe a young Army couple as adorable, but they were. Their wedding date was a month away, and our pastor invited my husband and I to share tips for a successful military marriage. No pressure!
I’ve been working on this writing for the last fifteen years. And it’s not done yet. I wanted to put down in writing, on “cyber-paper,” what I have lived and observed for most of my adult life. It’s what I love about our military . . . the people, the mission, the life. The truth is . . . as members of the United States military, people are watching you.