My husband returned four months ago from a year-long deployment to Afghanistan. This was our first deployment, and we were stationed in the United Kingdom when he was given the orders. We quickly had to decide whether I would stay in the UK or return to the States to be closer to family while he was gone. My husband thought I would be happier being close to family, but I felt the Lord telling me to trust Him and stay in the UK, even if it meant I was going to be alone. This was a hard decision because I felt I was staring my biggest fear right in the face—I was going to be left alone in a foreign country while my husband went to war. Scary!

Covenant. Commitment. These are words we share in the Christian church, and in the Christian marriage. And sometimes, as a time of remembrance and renewal, couples will recite their wedding vows again to each other . . . as a sign that “what was true then is still true now.” Perhaps even more so.

There is a story told about “two dogs” which battle within us. Some say it’s an Indian legend . . . some say it’s an old fable told long ago . . . but the story makes the rounds, and also makes a lot of sense. As the story goes, when a youngster comes to the old sage leader and asks why he feels so angry at unfair treatment, the older one explains, “It is as if there are two dogs inside of you. One is always good, peaceful, and loyal.

It is not unusual to discover magazines and newspapers with advice for romance and marriage-building in anticipation of Valentine’s Day. Lately I have been pleased to notice how this secular advice has lined up with advice shared in Christian communities. That’s because it works! I recently read a newspaper article espousing marriage-enriching habits of holding hands, having regular date nights, going to bed at the same time. . . and thought, “That’s exactly what Jim and Barbara would advise! Jim and Barbara Grunseth have been teaching and counseling couples for years. Their advice is sound, biblical, and practical. So I decided to get out my dog-eared and well-worn copy of one of their books, Remember the Rowboats: Anchor your Marriage to Christ, to share some of their timeless advice. You won’t find these points in newsstand copy, but you will find them encouraging and helpful—and true!

We had many “hellos” and “good-byes” during our military days—with plenty of TDYs, deployments, training, exercises, and the Vietnam War. The “good-byes” were always difficult (understatement) . . . and the “hellos” were always glorious. Whether we were parting for a day, a week, a month or a year I always tried to stick by the training I got from that one book and that one wives’ meeting.

I enjoy road trips—time alone in the car to sing along with praise music on the radio, see some pretty countryside, stop for coffee a time or two, and get caught up on some Bible studies. Recently I was listening to some really good Bible teaching on marriage and family issues from a favorite pastor/teacher. He said something like, “A great marriage will last at least 100 years.” I just about slammed on the brakes right there on the interstate! What???

It was her favorite Christmas present, she said. Perhaps it was his, too, but he was still recovering from long months at sea and was needing to catch up on sleep. As they stood before us they still had that “newlywed glow” about them, even though most of their wedded life had been spent apart due to military duty. So when they were telling us about their first Christmas together there were smiles going back and forth between each other, and eyes sparkling with the chance to tell what was so very special about their first time of giving and receiving gifts as husband and wife.