You would think after writing and editing Excellent or Praiseworthy since 2007, that I would have read, heard or thought about everything to be learned from Philippians 4:8 ... But in 2014, I was challenged by teaching I had never considered. That is taking Philippians 4:8 into one of the most normal, everyday struggles of marriage—conflict between husband and wife.
I was in the midst of a TDY and living with in-laws—on the road to a new PCS assignment—when God met me there. Because He met me there, He changed my heart. Because He changed my heart, He changed my life's worldview. Because He changed my life, He changed my marriage. Because He changed my marriage, He changed my home. Because He changed my home, He changed my children's hearts. Because He changed my children’s hearts, He changed their lives. Because He changed their lives, He changed their children’s hearts. God met me where I was (alone in Oklahoma)—and my world has never been the same. What road are you on? Are you on the road to Baghdad? to Kabul? to Bagram? to Qatar? to Kuwait? to Okinawa? to Norfolk? to Poland? to Cape May? to Ft. Pickett? to Camp Pendleton? to Osan? to training? God can meet you there.
During World War II the Germans became suspicious of the improved effectiveness of British pilots, especially at night. The British had a secret that made them so much more powerful than the German pilots - a secret that they covered for a time by leaking false information that they were feeding their pilots carrots in order to see better in the dark. Their secret was a newly-developed system called radar. . . Christians have their own not-so-secret weapon to help us navigate through hazards and stay on target – the Holy Spirit.
As noble and mature as military couples are, there is a fiery dart which Satan can fire straight from his arsenal into their hearts. It is the dart of discouragement, and I believe it is Satan’s favorite weapon. Oftentimes discouragement comes from a season of comparison—never a good idea to compare yourself, your marriage, your kids, your career, your possessions, your struggles, your purposes, with others. But we all do it. Sometimes we actually believe, “The grass is greener”—but it isn’t.
What is God training you for during this deployment? Does it feel like loneliness and frustration? Does it feel like so much “wax on, wax off”(mission preparations?). . . . . "sand the floor” (take care of the kids?). . . . “up, down” (pay the bills?). . . . “side to side” (month after month?). . . .and in the midst of all of that you cannot see what God is doing? Is it only when it is over that you can look back and see how God is putting it all together—and you have learned patience, grace, wisdom, discernment, perspective, endurance, self-control, perhaps forgiveness . . . in other words, character?
I have always appreciated a good mechanic. Whether it was for our own vehicles or those vehicles used in the military—the fact that reliable maintenance is necessary to perform the mission was never lost on me. So when my husband and I meet maintainers, we express our appreciation for their expertise and dedication. After all, nothing happens without them.
We gathered for Bible study, but our friend's face was downcast . . . a sure sign that his soul was, too. We knew he was dealing with marital problems, but there was also the pressure of an impending deployment. All of this weighing on his heart, his future—his now. It’s hard to know what to say sometimes—most of the time, really. So I said something scriptural that I don’t even remember, then added something like “God knows what you are going through and He is with you”. I followed the simple truth with a smile, and then closed with “but you already know that.” I guess I expected my smile to be returned with his smile—an understanding between us that I was just trying to do my best to help, but failing. But that’s not what happened. Instead he said with emphasis, “I do already know that. But I need to be reminded. Thank you.” I got the distinct impression that he really meant it.
She was a lay leader in her unit—deployed for seven months. Before she left we spent time together talking about her hopes for spiritual growth in herself, and her unit, during this time away from home. So when she returned it was a joy to link up and hear about what she had observed and experienced from her time away—visiting foreign ports, leading the chapel praise team, praying and reading devotions for those who gathered for fellowship and study. But I caught some doubt and discouragement in her voice.
Several years ago, FamilyLife (a Cru ministry), approached us about taking ExcellentorPraiseworthy.org online devotions and editing them for YouVersion devotions! The editors at FamilyLife were well-aware that YouVersion is an increasingly popular Bible app, and wanted to make our web-based encouragement available on mobile devices. So that’s how this project began! Three YouVersion devotionals are available for you and your spouse to access for the Countdown to Deployment (10 days), to study Scripture together with Connecting during Deployment (20 days), and to exercise “reintegrace” for Reintegration after Deployment (7 days).
Life is messy. People are messed-up. And it doesn’t take too many things to go wrong before we can really feel like we’re in a horrible mess. That’s because we live in a broken world. As military serving around the world and at home, you know that probably better than anybody. Ever since Adam and Eve and that fateful choice in The Garden (Genesis 3), the relationships between God and man, man and man, and man and this earth have been broken. But there’s hope, and His name is Jesus.