Parenting well during a deployment begins with our faith—which begins with belief in the truth of Scripture. Being “plugged in” to our source of faith, the Lord Jesus, allows us to be full of “living water” (the Holy Spirit) which will then flow through us to our children. To put it another way—as Jesus tells us in John 15:5—we are to “abide in the vine.” Our family just experienced a 15 month separation. As I look back, I can point to seven truths to share about parenting during deployment:
Reunion
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Finally brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence, or anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. — Philippians 4:8
Reunions need to begin the moment a spouse leaves for a deployment. As the deployed member prepares to leave, every day becomes one of anticipation of coming together again. Connection with your spouse before and during a deployment prepares your hearts for a harmonious reunion at the end of separation. As a couple you must connect on three levels: mind, heart and spirit/soul. This is known as three-part harmony.
With their minds a couple should share their fears about the deployment, but not dwell on “what if’s,” or how they will be different when they are together again. With their hearts they should listen with understanding, hear what their spouse is saying, and remember that a feeling is neither right nor wrong—it just is. With their spirits each spouse should pray relentlessly for the other, pray for God’s help in the difficult situations they will face while apart, and pray for their spouse and marriage.
Connecting spouses emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually before the deployment maintains a healthy balance in the relationship for when the couple comes together again. Remember a reunion starts before a spouse ever leaves home.
Questions to Share:
1. How can you connect with your spouse with your mind, with your heart, and with your spirit during deployment?
2. How does this connection prepare you for a sweet reunion?

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