“Dad, I just want you to hold me!”

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The LORD appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love.” —Jeremiah 31:3

I remember my Dad, an imperfect but very faithful man. Married almost 61 years, a WWII Medic in the Battle of the Bulge, a school principal for 37 years. A stoic man, not much for emotions but a kind-hearted man in so many ways. One day, when I was 27 and still on active duty, he and I were arguing about something trivial. I so wanted his approval. I did not understand his language of love.

He stopped abruptly and said in a loud voice, “Jim, what is it that you want from me?!” There in his kitchen I looked at him and blurted out, “Dad, I just want you to hold me!” He could have shamed me. Instead, he walked over to me and gave me a big ol’ WWII Vet Bear Hug. Our true relationship began.

After that, I did not feel I had to earn his approval anymore. I knew he loved me and was proud of me. We began going out for breakfast together once a week. We became good friends!

I did not quite understand how my Heavenly Fatherly loved me yet. But learning this Faith Principle: “Faith is choosing to live as though the Bible is true regardless of circumstances, emotions, or cultural trends” has helped bring God’s love for me into clear focus. God loves me whether I feel it or not. He loves me whether I measure up or not. I’m loved forever! Hugs help, too.

You know, not only does God want us to show His kind of love to our parents and our children, but . . . .especially to our spouse. Try telling your spouse and others this week that you love them huggingly so and that they . . . .

• Don’t have to improve;
• Don’t have to become better;
• Don’t have to measure up;
• Don’t have to earn favor through performance;
• That you love them just the way they are. No matter what, you will never waiver in your love for them. We especially need to hear that during deployment!

Will you try this? Jesus commands us to: “Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” (John 13;34) He means choose right now to pursue the people in your life, rapidly forgive them as Jesus forgave you, and issue kind, supportive, affirming words with countenance and loyalty.

Yes, there may need to be “tough love” required in some difficult situations. However, in general, we are totally without excuse when we “write off” a family member, hold grudges, and seek to punish them by slander, insult, rejection, or by giving them the silent treatment!

Let me challenge you to pursue and issue the same grace-filled, forgiving, kind love that Jesus shows you to your spouse, children, parents, in-laws and others.

“Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you.”—Hebrews 13;5

For more writing by Jim Grunseth, go to http://marriageanchors.com

Questions to Share:

1. Were you loved unconditionally as a child? If so, you know how good it can be. If not, you know how much you need that.

2. You may need to start by extending unconditional love to someone—perhaps your spouse or family. Pray for God to strengthen you to be able to do that.