Chuck Swindoll, one of our favorite preachers, loves to tell stories of when he was a Marine on active duty. These stories offer multiple illustrations for his sermons. So it was not a surprise that on Veterans Day he posted a special prayer on his ministry website—and also gave his thanks to all of you who serve so faithfully. We want to share his prayer with you today, in honor of your sacrificial service to our dear country:
Parenting well during a deployment begins with our faith—which begins with belief in the truth of Scripture. Being “plugged in” to our source of faith, the Lord Jesus, allows us to be full of “living water” (the Holy Spirit) which will then flow through us to our children. To put it another way—as Jesus tells us in John 15:5—we are to “abide in the vine.” Our family just experienced a 15 month separation. As I look back, I can point to seven truths to share about parenting during deployment:
I did some vehicle recovery training early in my military career. I don’t remember much of it other than this one exercise where the instructors drove an M113 Armored Personnel Carrier into a swamp and told us to drag it out using some ropes, pulleys, ground anchors and get this---a hand winch! An M113 weighs around 10 tons and this one was down a bank and in the mud. The winch was rated for 2 tons! We followed the instructor’s directions and set up a series of ropes running through pulleys and anchored to solid ground at the other end. The pulley was then attached to the end of another rope and so on. The theory was that each pulley/rope/ground anchor we set up doubled the weight we could pull because the ground anchors would take half the weight.
Bob and Cheryl Moeller do a great job of ministering and training singles—in the disciplines of the faith, in their spiritual walk as singles, and in their lives of dating and preparation for marriage. Recently on their website, ForKeepsMinistries.com, Bob included his list of “Ten Things I Did Right, Ten Things I Did Wrong” from his own season of singleness, with the Scriptures which inspired his reflections:
October 31st is the date most well-known for the holiday we call Halloween. In a 2007 report, the estimated economic impact of Halloween is between 4 billion and 6 billion dollars—and now estimated to exceed $8 million. In Al Mohler’s article “Christianity and the Dark Side—What about Halloween?” he quotes historian Nicholas Rogers as saying, “Halloween is currently the second most important party night in North America. In terms of its retail potential, it is second only to Christmas. This commercialism fortifies its significance as a time of public license, a custom-designed opportunity to have a blast. Regardless of its spiritual complications, Halloween is big business.” But did you know that October 31st is also the anniversary of the day Martin Luther nailed his 95 theses to the church door in Wittenberg, Germany?
I’ve been married to a soldier almost 14 years now and I think I’ve spent the whole time waiting. I’ve waited for orders, for our children (infertility then the process of adoption – twice), for deployments to start, for deployments to end. By now I should have the patience of Job. But I don’t. Waiting is really tough stuff.
During childhood many of us were taught the Lord’s Prayer. We can recite it “from memory” and it doesn’t mean a thing, if we’re not careful. Whether we call it the “Lord’s Prayer” or the “Model Prayer” it reads like this in Matthew 6:9-13: “. . . Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be Thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts (some say ‘trespasses’), as we forgive our debtors (or ‘those who trespass against us’). And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil: For Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.” Whether praying this prayer before going out on patrol in the desert, before going to bed at night, or as part of worship or a discipline of daily time with God, it’s a good reminder to examine this prayer for our “heart attitude” so that it doesn’t become just part of a “check-list of to-dos.”
Reunions need to begin the moment a spouse leaves for a deployment. As the deployed member prepares to leave, every day becomes one of anticipation of coming together again. Connection with your spouse before and during a deployment prepares your hearts for a harmonious reunion at the end of separation. As a couple you must connect on three levels: mind, heart and spirit/soul. This is known as three-part harmony.
Picture this—both sides in a battle are lobbing grenades at one another. The grenades blow up causing much destruction on each side. Now imagine that the two sides fighting are really a husband and a wife. The “grenades” are words and actions—and somehow both partners seem surprised when they “blow up”! Lots of hurt. . .lots of anger. . .and it just gets worse and worse. The fighting can continue right into the divorce court. If you’ve ever seen this happening in a couple, or experienced it yourself, you know that it’s just crazy!
In thinking about my all-time favorite messages of Pastor Chuck Swindoll’s, I have come to the conclusion that his teaching on “worry” is probably the best I had ever heard on that sticky subject. And it has stuck with me through the years. . . .at least in my memory if not in my actions. According to my study, this message was first preached in 1990 and entitled "Christ at the Crossroad of Anxiety." I would like to share what I transcribed from the recording of that timely sermon, as perhaps there is something in it which would help you in these days of deployment anxiety.