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Hearing Voices

Some of the biggest mistakes I have made were because I followed bad advice. I listened to the wrong “voices.” I thought that following current cultural trends was more important than following age-old wisdom. I thought that everyone’s motives were pure and that they knew what was best for me. I thought I could trust anyone with experience, even if that experience had led them into failure. I thought that many college degrees made a person an expert. I thought that an older generation couldn’t possibly relate to my contemporary situations. I thought that no one could possibly understand what I was going through unless they had “walked a mile in my shoes.” I thought that clichés like, “if it feels good, do it”. . . and “I’m okay, you’re okay” . . . and “there’s no such thing as black and white—everything is gray,” were true statements on which to base major decisions. And in a very contradictory way, I thought there was no such thing as truth—that humanism and situational ethics ruled the day. I was wrong, and many others with me. And there are consequences to bad choices.

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Who Are You With?

When I was in Afghanistan I took a couple of long drives to other camps and was always wary of what could happen on those drives. We did a lot of preparation to make sure the risks were reduced to a minimum. One time I had a forward air controller with me, someone who could call for help from the Air Force if we needed it. It was amazing how much more relaxed I was knowing that if someone did give us trouble, some serious firepower would turn up quickly in order to help us out. That is why I like Psalm 93 so much — it reminds me that we have some serious firepower backing us up all the time.

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“I Need to Be Reminded”

We gathered for Bible study, but our friend's face was downcast . . . a sure sign that his soul was, too. We knew he was dealing with marital problems, but there was also the pressure of an impending deployment. All of this weighing on his heart, his future—his now. It’s hard to know what to say sometimes—most of the time, really. So I said something scriptural that I don’t even remember, then added something like “God knows what you are going through and He is with you”. I followed the simple truth with a smile, and then closed with “but you already know that.” I guess I expected my smile to be returned with his smile—an understanding between us that I was just trying to do my best to help, but failing. But that’s not what happened. Instead he said with emphasis, “I do already know that. But I need to be reminded. Thank you.” I got the distinct impression that he really meant it.

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Be Still and Know

What if, in the midst of whatever size storm you are in, God is calling you to pause, be still and know He is God? In my prayer time back in 2004, just after I learned of my husband’s adultery, there were so many opportunities to make rash decisions. In many of our conversations, it seemed the easy and culturally acceptable course of action would be to say “I’m done” and file for divorce. I thank God for the women in my life who encouraged me with Psalm 46:10. Be still and know that I am God… -Psalm 46:10

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Having “The Talk”

While researching the material for the new HomeBuilders study Making Your Marriage Deployment Ready, our writing team met with numerous chaplains, churches, and service members of all branches as we pursued a goal of ensuring our material was relevant to the challenges of military life today. One of the significant meetings was with a Gold Star widow near Ft. Hood. She insisted—maybe even stronger than that—that we include an exercise in the study which would walk a couple through the steps of having “The Talk.”

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“The Submariner Treatment”

I have a great dentist. Through the years he has taken care of my teeth by preventing problems and treating problems. Lately he has even put up with some of my whining about aging, expensive crowns, and gum erosion . . . Just the other day, when I was in for a “routine cleaning” (thank goodness there wasn’t anything else wrong!), I told him that the next time I come in I will need a thorough exam because I might be heading to a remote location for a while—and I don’t want any surprises while I am away. His response was, “Oh, so you want The Submariner Treatment!”

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Thrive, not just Survive!

It was at Ft. Hood that we first heard the phrase, “I don’t want to just survive, I want to thrive!” A young Army wife was expressing her determination that, no matter what the circumstances, she was going to make the best of the deployment which she and her husband were facing (again). Seated around the table were others who agreed with her—they were tired of being categorized in a role of “victim” and were wanting to show the world what good stuff Army wives are made of! It was impressive. . . . a meeting I don’t think I will ever forget.

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40 Days of the Deployment Dare

We look forward to what the Lord is going to do with these online opportunities to use the principles of The Love Dare and practice unconditional love for your spouse. Whether deployed or at home, whether you have seen the movie “Fireproof” or not, whether you have a copy of the book or not, there will be something in this exercise which will challenge you to love like you mean it. Please, take the dare. It will be worth it!

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Top Ten Predictions of 2019

I have several friends who email me “forwards.” Perhaps you do, too. I received this one back a few years ago--and I like to return to it, this time for 2019. The ten predictions are from the forwarded email (author unknown). . . . .and the additional comments are from Scripture, and my heart. Top 10 Predictions for 2019: 1. “The Bible will still have all the answers.”

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Christmas –“A Military Maneuver”

Pastor Tommy Nelson, of Denton Bible Church in Texas, gave a sermon to his church for Christmas, 1988, entitled “Jesus’ View of Christmas.” The text for this powerful sermon was an unlikely one . . . Luke 11:21-26. Those verses are several chapters away from the traditional Christmas story which we all know and love, Luke 2:1-20: “And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that all the world should be taxed . . . “ I was intrigued. How could verses about Jesus and Satan give us a message for Christmas?

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