It seemed innocent enough. He was driving to military training in another state---and stopped for a cup of coffee. While in line waiting for the barista to complete his order, a lady in line struck up a conversation with him. One thing led to another, and they sat down to finish their coffees.Turns out she was having some relationship problems with her ex . . . . . and he thought he could help. She gave him her phone number and they stayed in touch. He didn’t tell his wife about the meeting—it all seemed innocent enough. Again, one thing led to another . . . . and a year and a half later he and his wife are divorced, leaving three kids confused and hurting. He and the young woman at the coffee house are “dating”—an unlikely meeting now turned into a marriage disaster. Certainly there is a lot more to the story (there always is). But the details are only concentric circles around Satan’s target of this young man’s heart, and the ripple effect of the marital breakdown will continue for generations.

This Mother’s Day I join the ranks of millions of mothers who have gone before me, saying good-by to their sons and daughters and sending them off to war. Today my son is deploying to Afghanistan.In the past I have seen my brother off to the jungles of southeast Asia—and my husband off to the airfields of the same. Later, good-byes became common during our military career (love those Hellos!) . . . . but I had always heard that feelings are different when it is your child leaving. I think that’s true. I need perspective.

We know a lot about respect in the military. We give each other honor out of respect for things military personnel do, rank that is held, and courage and leadership we see displayed. We wear medals that our superiors bestow on us to honor our contribution. We know about honor and respect and we like it when we get it. Why then is it sometimes so hard for us to apply this knowledge at home?

Forgiveness is such a counter-intuitive response to someone who does something wrong to us.It really doesn’t make any obvious sense to let people who offend us get away with it. What does seem to make sense is harboring our offense, letting it grow into bitterness and then releasing it as revenge.Many of us imagine Hollywood-like revenge scenarios. In our imaginings we are calm and cool and deliver a long, moving and convincing speech to someone who is undeniably a villain.We see a look of recognition in their eyes as they fall to our stinging, yet completely justifiable blows. They realize that we are completely right and that they are getting their just desserts . . . with extra syrup. Oh how Satan has us fooled!

Have you ever pushed the “Send” button on an email or text. . . .and then wished you could “take it back”? Once it’s gone, it’s gone. . . .and if you’ve experienced this feeling of regret, or maybe even panic, you know that email & texting are great tools but have their limitations. Without tone of voice, without context, without a smile or a frown, without really knowing how the other person is going to “receive” your message—it’s hard to rely on technology to communicate everything you want to your spouse.

Recently we had the privilege of meeting with a couple married over sixty years—and he had served in three wars. He also was a POW in Vietnam for over six years. Their love and commitment to each other was evident in their story, in their smiles for each other, and in the way (during the interview), they held each other’s hand. This picture is of their loving clasp. They told us that they hold hands often, and everywhere they go.