I would be surprised if you have gotten through this deployment without any tears. Tears when your spouse left; tears during the long months of separation; tears at special occasions when your loved one’s presence is especially missed . . . tears matter. Tears matter to God.

“If I’ve done something wrong, I’m sorry.” “. . . . and I’ll try not to do it again, but I can’t guarantee anything.” “I was wrong to _____, but it was really your fault.” Have you ever heard statements like these, or maybe even said them yourself? Clumsy apologies—if you can even call them apologies. And in marriage a bad apology, or lack of an apology, can begin to cost you the whole relationship.

Picture this—both sides in a battle are lobbing grenades at one another. The grenades blow up causing much destruction on each side. Now imagine that the two sides fighting are really a husband and a wife. The “grenades” are words and actions—and somehow both partners seem surprised when they “blow up”! Lots of hurt. . .lots of anger. . .and it just gets worse and worse. The fighting can continue right into the divorce court. If you’ve ever seen this happening in a couple, or experienced it yourself, you know that it’s just crazy!

I had the amazing opportunity to watch the Disney classic, "Sleeping Beauty,"with my children for family movie night a few weeks ago.  I guess I loved fairy tales since I was little, and so watching my seven-year-old daughter’s delight, as the prince fights evil Malificent’s dragon, was pretty cool.  But I tend to toss aside the fairy tales now in the trenches of being a soldier’s wife, and can often drown in the feeling of being solo with the kids at home.  If I am honest.  Yet, I know my active-duty, oft-deployed, husband is a gift from God.  But, still, I can wrestle, like many, with the whole marriage “fairy tale,” or “happily ever after.”

Excellent or Praiseworthy is posted on Monday and Thursday nights. Editor’s Note: There are fifty-two good quotes here about married life. That’s one for every week of the year. Enjoy! “Haven’t you read,” (Jesus) replied, “that at the beginning the…

A woman in our military unit had been corresponding with her old boyfriend for months, unbeknownst to her husband (but shared with the other wives), emailing and instant messaging late into the night. She was convinced she would be happier if she filed for divorce, hoped for the best for her children, and returned to the arms of the one she did not marry. While the geographical distance prevented her from having a physical relationship with this man, she was clearly in an emotional affair.