“Many people ask me how it feels to be the wife of a former serviceman. I can sum it up in one word: personal. It’s very personal because it’s now our story, our sacrifice, our time lost. Joe’s deployment to Iraq directly affected who we were and who we are today. Surviving the experience for Joe (physically and emotionally), and for me (psychologically and emotionally), taught us that living out our vows was overwhelmingly important and real."
Have you ever wondered. . . . Where in the world did we get the idea that sin has no consequences?
As noble and mature as military couples are, there is a fiery dart which Satan can fire straight from his arsenal into their hearts. It is the dart of discouragement, and I believe it is Satan’s favorite weapon. Oftentimes discouragement comes from a season of comparison—never a good idea to compare yourself, your marriage, your kids, your career, your possessions, your struggles, your purposes, with others. But we all do it. Sometimes we actually believe, “The grass is greener”—but it isn’t.
Some of the biggest mistakes I have made were because I followed bad advice. I listened to the wrong “voices.” I thought that following current cultural trends was more important than following age-old wisdom. I thought that everyone’s motives were pure and that they knew what was best for me. I thought I could trust anyone with experience, even if that experience had led them into failure. I thought that many college degrees made a person an expert. I thought that an older generation couldn’t possibly relate to my contemporary situations. I thought that no one could possibly understand what I was going through unless they had “walked a mile in my shoes.” I thought that clichés like, “if it feels good, do it”. . . and “I’m okay, you’re okay” . . . and “there’s no such thing as black and white—everything is gray,” were true statements on which to base major decisions. And in a very contradictory way, I thought there was no such thing as truth—that humanism and situational ethics ruled the day. I was wrong, and many others with me. And there are consequences to bad choices.
We have turned the calendar’s page to 2025. Does that make you feel older? Certainly it marks a passage of time, and for those of you experiencing deployment that comes as good news or bad news. If you’re getting ready to come home, you probably want those days to pass quickly. If you’re waiting to deploy, you might want time to move slowly. But whether it moves slowly or quickly time is taking its toll on all of us and we’re growing older. That’s the truth of it. When my husband would come home from work during periods of time when an assignment was not going particularly well, I would ask him, “How was work today?” He would answer, “One more day off the tour!”
As Christians, we believe our minds, souls, and bodies were created for God-ordained rhythms of work, rest, and worship. Military duty necessarily pulls us away from these rhythms. Even as I am thankful, proud, and grounded because of my military experience, the intensity of that experience has a shadow side which takes a toll on many veterans.
When I was in Afghanistan I took a couple of long drives to other camps and was always wary of what could happen on those drives. We did a lot of preparation to make sure the risks were reduced to a minimum. One time I had a forward air controller with me, someone who could call for help from the Air Force if we needed it. It was amazing how much more relaxed I was knowing that if someone did give us trouble, some serious firepower would turn up quickly in order to help us out. That is why I like Psalm 93 so much — it reminds me that we have some serious firepower backing us up all the time.
Life is messy. People are messed-up. And it doesn’t take too many things to go wrong before we can really feel like we’re in a horrible mess. That’s because we live in a broken world. As military serving around the world and at home, you know that probably better than anybody. Ever since Adam and Eve and that fateful choice in The Garden (Genesis 3), the relationships between God and man, man and man, and man and this earth have been broken. But there’s hope, and His name is Jesus.
It is the end of 2024–the beginning of 2025 and the perfect time to ask the question “Who is Jesus Christ?” Even better, it is the perfect time to answer the question, “Who is Jesus Christ to me?” It’s a very personal question on which all of life hinges. It is interesting that Jesus begins this encounter with His disciples by asking who “others” believe that He is. Very interesting.
This matter of “gifting” is complicated. Before Christmas I have my list, which only seems to grow as I think of more and more people I want to “remember” with some kind of something. But then there is the matter of “how much do I spend on each gift?” You want your gifts to be meaningful—but what if what you really want to buy is more than you can afford? And what if you just don’t know what to give—is a gift card a good option or a cop-out?